Every Cook Has a Bad Day

And mine was last night. I was too ambitious for the time that I had. Or the stars were misaligned. Or it was my husband's fault. You know what I mean. I had been planning to make train cut-out cookies for my son to take to school. They looked lovely, in my mind's eye.

For birthdays at school, the principal comes in and he leads the class in a birthday song. Then my son gets a personal card and a special birthday pencil from the principal. And to finish off, they have cookies that I bring for my son. I really wanted to make these fancy train cookies with three colors, outlined in black, with a window, and with wheels. Oh, they were so cool looking.

After I put the boy to bed (this takes up precious time and I have to do it because my husband is on a business trip - this is why it's his fault) and have a quick rest, I make the frosting. At nine thirty at night! This should have been my first clue. I make a thick frosting; it's so thick that it won't spread. Naturally, I add water to thin it out, only I didn't measure it. Since I'm in a hurry, I dumped it in from our crappy faucet. By the way our faucet has two settings, on and off. But, what the heck, right. I mix it and put it in the piping bag. This is my second time using a piping bag (another clue, right?).

I pipe blue on all the cookies and it looks average but I really need to hustle if I want to get to bed. I go too fast, the tip is too big and I put too much frosting on. The blue is dripping off of many cookie edges. Yeah, this might be my second clue; but it's not. I mix up some pink only to realize that I don't have enough frosting for the three other colors- the wheels, the window, and the outlining. I quickly add too much water from my crappy faucet and make the pink way too runny. But, I go with it because I'm tired and I want to get these cookies done. It's ten thirty by now and I'm yawning like crazy. So I pipe on runny pink frosting. And, boy does it run and drip all over the place. These cookies look like they've got multiple stalagtites hanging off their edges. I know my son will be thrilled with all the blue and pink colored icing on the counter that he can pick off and eat. Being a trooper, I think I can salvage it, somehow.

After I pipe on all the runny pink I realize that the cookies look terrible. At this point, I should have gone to bed but I really wanted to make these cookies. So at eleven o'clock I had the bright idea of scraping all the pink and blue off of all the cookies and putting on one solid color with perhaps a few sprinkles. Brilliant. Yawn, yawn. Really, I am yawning like crazy now. I also feel like crying. When I scrape, I realize that I can't really get at all the frosting that oozed over the sides. I end up with blue and pink stained cookies with pink and blue stains off the sides. Yet, I am hopeful. I see these perfect lovely train cookies and I think I can...

I make up a new batch thick red frosting. This time, I think I get the consistency correct and I begin piping. But wait, what's that oozing on my hand. Of course, it's red frosting from the bag that just burst because I put too much pressure due to the frosting being too thick.

Remember the scraping, well in the process of scraping, I break a couple of cookies. Only, I don't have any extra because I just don't (this should have been another clue). All I could think to do at this point was eat the broken cookies. So here I am with icing that needs to be used, a bunch of pink and blue stained cookies with stained drips off the sides, not enough cookies, it's about eleven thirty, and I'm tired of cookie decorating.

As I stood at the sink dipping into the vat of red frosting, I think I got my final clue. I'll just go buy some lovely cookies on the way to school. Got the clue. Done.